I Have A Little List…

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly writing challenge: “Countdown.”

Like KoKo in Gilbert and Sullivan’s ‘Mikado’, ‘I’ve got a little list‘ of people and things from 2014:

10.  Those pestilential nuisances
who ring you during lunch
with a pre-recorded message
about your boiler or PFI.

9. Men and women
who insist on social kissing
whether they know you or not.

8.  People with no faith at all
who ask if you’re ‘religious’.

7.  People who drink instant coffee,
then puff it in your face.

6.  Men who burp and fart,
and find it very funny.

5.  Unit-ed Kingdom
Independence Party.

4.  He who scorns UKIP
but never would leave London
nor read the ‘Daily Mail’.

3.  Flapping, drooping banners
screaming ‘Outstanding School’
on some dreary place of learning
where learning ne’er took place.

2..Hosts and restaurant-owners
who suppose vegetarians
eat fish, or even chicken.

1..Politically correct people,
and ‘in-appropr-iate’,
but think they’re better than you.

They’ll none of ’em be missed in 2015 .  On no, Dear Reader.  They’ll none of ’em be missed…


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